Scribbles from my Journal

Bounce Back Loosers

Lip Synch Battle MTV Base Africa

Sandton city shopping centre in the City Exclusive

Last night  I took a L but tonight I bounce back . Big Sean lyrics … Oh yeah we about to get grimmy as the queen would say to the beehive. 
Hope you Beauts are well . If you not doing too well then welcome to the start of something hopeful.
August was a gorgeous month. Yes I know you guys  don’t check your calender it is nearly a month later but I have to get this off my chest .
We have all been through phases when you try and try to excel in an area of your life but you keep failing after trying and doing your best. You even lighten your approach and tell yourself arrrgh I am just going to have fun and not take this that seriously.That way you will do your very best even way better.
Dude well I literally had this experience at least 3 times in a competition called Lip Synch battle in the City edition.And so had Shaka at least attempting 4 times .

Let’s start at the very beginning Do Ray Me fa so la ti do

Here’s the thing sometime in August I had an appointment scheduled for the dentist.  I haven’t been to a local dentist in the Gauteng region so what I did was assume I knew where my appointed dentist was located . I didn’t check the map I just read travel clinic and I assumed there was only one in Sandton that I was familiar with. Anyhoo I pitched up at the wrong location which was at the medical mews inside the Sandton City shopping centre. Shaka went with me for moral support due to the fact that dentistry freaks me out completely.  We both were frustrated more so him after  being dragged along . I was on a call rescheduling my appointment while Shaka stopped for a sec to chat to a friend who was doing promo for the event taking place in the mall which of course was the lip synch battle .

Dollar Bills

After not getting a rescheduled appointment on the phone due to the dentist now being fully booked . I threw my hands up and was more relieved  that it just wasn’t meant to be that day . Nudge nudge I have been detrimently avoiding this moment anyway . Shaka already signed up to compete . I was like huh and I quote ” do you know what you signing up for ” well he didn’t exactly he just heard that the winner would walk away with R2000 in shopping vouchers for the day and an overall winner throughout the two week competition would win R20 000 in cash kaching. Dolla Bills Yall!
I was down for that an entered as well you know to double our chances .I looked so crappy that day we decided to head home and change.We made the effort to head back ready to compete.  We decided what we were going to do with the voucher of R2000 and we such foodies we envisioned our first filled grocery trolley . That’s the dream you guys lol I know it may seem silly to you but when that day comes I have made it.
So we competed in the same round after selecting songs and performing to them.  Shaka went first I went second last and what happens is . Due to the fact that it is in a shopping centre the crowed gets to select a winner by the amount of noise they make .So our chances were dependent on crowed cheers however Shoppers stand in and leave not staying for the entire show . When Shaka went up as the first competitor there wasn’t a crowed to begin with.  Having said that by the time the show was at the deciding end the people who saw shaka’s round had left . I however made it to the final and the girl who won had an audience in the crowed of people who worked with her. She was staff inside one of the stores in the shopping centre . Her friends had taken their lunch breaks and were all in to support her. I had no one in the crowed and in the end we both lost.

Finding a way to win

We considered the logistics and were told by the event staff that we had to come back and try again. They were so convinced that we had it in the bag. We just needed to try again.  So we did and we lost again.  The event staff were strategizing that we go in separate rounds and so we did and lost again. By then we were at that point when I just ran out of days to try again cause I had to work however  Shaka went and tried again yet he lost again. The 2 weeks flew by and two days before the finale . We got a call from the event manager requesting us to renter as wild cards . We were so stoked but I had to be at work Shaka had the day to spare . This would be his 4th attempt . Fortunately that day I could leave early just to support him. And so I did before the show was about to start the competitors were uneven and it would have been a 3 way battle. They then needed another wild card cause the previous winners never pitched . I was then asked to compete by the staff and for the heck of it I did .
see Instavideo

We try and try again

Shaka did extremely well like he was a kill off but we had no personal support in the crowed so it was logistically over regardless . He even danced and tilted a gogo.

gogo noun (South African)

1.

ɡrandmother
Whether you won or not each competitor walked a way with a 6 pack fanta zero we had collected a few by then.This was suppose to be it. The team of the event was routing for us . However the rules go that the crowed had the final decision and so they did . We lost again.

There is always good in every bit of bad

The heart throb of this was how we never gave up and tried again. We know we rocked it we knew we gave our best . The team of the event was so amazing we ended up meeting new friends and exchanged numbers with the staff. It was so cool because we had and still have a great attitude about loosing countless times . We would leave the mall after loosing making fun at how we both lost . I would chant the song nana nana nana nana hay hay hay . As they would at wrestlemania.  It was just an epic disaster in the best way.

We gave ourselves a pat on the…

No matter what you end up loosing in take that L and bounce back. Those are just one of my highlighted experiences in Johannesburg with Shaka the bae that I could never forget . The day of the finale when we entered as wild cards .After loosing we had the best splurging lunch ever . We went to mug and bean we shopped till we dropped we had deserts at the bread basket . It was retail therapy in the most deserving way. We gave ourselves that pat on the ass.Attitude is everything.  Perception and perspective are two different things . Perception is the obvious scenario . When things are what they are however you can win with having a perspective that is positive and vibing to a bounce back mentality. Who knows the person who won in each round over us might have needed that vouchers or money more than we did . We carved an awesome memory we made friends we did our best and we were loosers who never lost anything at all we gained even more of what we already had which was more of each other in the best bounce back spirit ever .
Be happy to comment down your thoughts below xoxo T
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Scribbles from my Journal

Friday the 17th Leveled Up

From bad to Worst 2.0

We all have those days when everything go from bad to worst. I have written about an experience such as this before.  Feel free to catch up over here however… I promise you this continuation couldn’t compare nor could  you guys imagine how my recent experience has unfold.From bad to worst 2.0 unscripted and detailed down below.
I titled these bad to worst blog post ” Friday the 17th” because the first chaotic one occurred on that exact date. A day I clearly dated as a mental note and decided to share with you.
The end result of that first blog post in my view ended with a wishy washy kind of here is how to get through it. I mean this in the best possible way. No sarcasm I promise. At that time a wishy washy how to option helped but in this scenario it took more than just that few remedies.
Extract from my previous post
As candy coated as my world was created to be nothing ever goes according to Plan or unforeseen circumstances arises . You faced with challenges perhaps when things just turned out to be good . Relationships become tarnished . You carry scars from disappointment and you doubt yourself or become isolated in a room full of people.
 It always sucks to be in a predicament but its important to push through it. I found that the most challenging experiences I have had is when you give up on yourself that is the moment people give up on you.
How do I not quit on myself? Here are some of the things that helped me through crappy situations 
  • If God shows up for you you need to show up for him. Appreciate the second chance you get each waking day
  • Count your blessings gratitude influence your attitude
  • Hearing the word of God Faith comes by hearing and hearing the word of God
  • This life is not about you its way more than just your here and now
  • Indulge in the Pretty Things. There is hope in the beauty that surrounds you

So here is what happened

 A month ago I was down and feeling so low mentally and emotionally. I couldn’t see solutions beyond my cloudy state of mind. Here’s what happened I was insecure in my role at work. I felt like I wasn’t growing and bare in mind  not growing in a 9 am to 5 pm  J.O.B for 23 days a month becomes claustrophobic. You basically drowning in untapped potential . I couldn’t see any solutions due to a lot of external factors limiting the most obvious solutions . Let me put it this way realistically we as a team in my work field aren’t progressing in terms of our productivity because we see less clients due to a 2 year construction taking place on our premises.  Lately the construction has been so staggering that our version of bad went to worst. I was at this point already demotivated and then discovered that new staff I had been training were earning way more than I have . So I went from zero to 100. Without approaching anyone in my work space . I was internally soaking this shiz in you guys.  This was the exact day I came across Desert Missus blog post  and I had a venting buddy who breathed new life into my situation. Like saaaaay whaaaat Yes I know . See down below

This was so meant for me. First off you killed me with your choice of words”bitch fest” ahs and jahs. It is always fun reading your blogs.

This was meant for me because I have been dealing with an internal bitch fest. I live in Sandton now and making the effort to call home in Cape Town is such a mission. No one picks up at the peek of my fumes. So I am just like forget it I will sulk for the next few days and then get over myself.

I have been senior in my position for nearly 4 years still earning the same salary since I started. I am training new staff that earns a R1000 more than me. Finding another job I haven’t been winning. My HR Manager hasn’t bothered to respond to my email. I can do more than a lot of the people in my office space. but you know what the fudge here I am in the same old financial boat.

However reading this post was such a wake up call like I could use this time to study the people around me and better myself for when the opportunity avails itself.

I literally bookmarked this post just so that I can have a read through it again at home. Cause this hasn’t totally sink in yet but the timing couldn’t be more perfect for me.

How bloggers save the day

You will be amazed at how powerful a blog post could be .There could be someone who would relate to your post on so many levels. No pressure to you who might be a blogger but come on really you have the ability to create a shift in the day of someone else  They could be experiencing that exact same scenario you drafting about even if you thousands of miles away. And find refuge in you as a blogger for being bold enough to step it up. If not more drawn to you at least they would hang on to your sincere words and power in your voice as a writer.
So I finally revised on desert Missus blog post more than once and tried finding a confident approach to the situation but I just couldn’t. I e-mailed my amazing HR manager however she hasn’t responded as soon as I hoped . So I became never minded and comfy in my misery. I was under pressure at work not just due to my own insecurities and the external factors . I had a heated argument with a colleague and Shaka and I became what they call stiff. We couldn’t relate to each others personal problems it was an overwhelming day in a nutshell.

There is always a Super women around this time her name is Nicky

Nicky this beaut whom I would always have a brief Convo with came in that day and I just puked out a desperate yet sarcastic question. “Nicky do you see me working for you anytime soon  “and she looked me in the eye daring me to challenge the why out of my desperation.  What she said to me I still hold on to today. That I am not doing my best and not doing it strategically. I was working harder but not smarter. My attitude towards others were great but towards myself it sucked. I have been soaking in my misery instead of sharing or confiding in someone to save my pride.
She didn’t sugar coat me at all. The tone of our convo was like that of a grown women to a grown up girl. She helped me look towards practical and possible solutions. instead of being blinded to my here and now. She said that if I were to be in a different work environment that wouldn’t change my attitude or method of daily success. Which is true I have been seeking for different work opportunities but I haven’t thrived at being the best in my current position so what would make me think I would thrive anywhere else.
Life always starts with where you are now. Most parents birth their kids not in the most ideal situation but they do it in the there and now.  You wouldn’t have a choice  but to push through at 9 months and beyond whatever due date.If that baby is coming that baby is coming. Sometimes we get ourselves in the ” my water broke”situation which is not as bad as it seems. We can be so stubborn and filled with pride. That it is necessary to push through hardships in order to change something as simple as your attitude. Your attitude could mean everything. It sets the tone to your day. It elevates keeping things to yourself and pushes you to share what you going through with someone willing to help.
Nicky never threw money at me or a new career path. She had a lengthy one with me in order to help me get perspective. She threw plenty gems at me one of which I clothe parts of my heart in was saving a R50 or R60 to go out once a month with Shaka and spend it on one cocktail at a place we wouldn’t normally go to around Sandton. Hearing her just add colour to my black and white imagination got me excited. Why go out for cocktails or coffee ?She suggested to stay refreshed and focus on why we both moved to Sandton anyway. Especially when we feel stuck surround yourself in the Sandton ambiance  or whichever lifestyle you hoping to flourish in. When I find myself in sticky situations Shaka is normally going through some ish as well. For the sake of his privacy I wont add much of what he was going through but I will say it was hard to relate to each others situation when we were already overwhelmed with our own. Nicky was my ah ha and oooh ah Oprah Winfrey in that second. In a nutshell she was totally a Superwomen that rocked up and saved my day. Words couldn’t be enough therefore I just had to share her amazeballness with you. She is kickass in every way if I had to share the rest of her pep talk trust me this post would go 2000 words and beyond. Nudge Nudge Wink Wink more of this beaut to follow soon.

Wish Washyness Aside

Yes my previous gems from my first post on Friday the 17th does stir up your uneasyness however together is better. Find a girlfriend confident enough to push you off that cliff and bungee jump the distance you have left in this stretch called life. If you don’t have the courage to walk up to a confidant reach out to that blogger who is walking in your shoes. Have the courage to approach someone who you might sense is going through a hard time. I cant express my sincere gratitude enough towards her taking the time to unwrap my bandages.
So much has changed since then…  And its literally just been a month thus far. I have had my water broken and cried till my hearts content. I picked myself up from the ground of self pity. We spent that R60 each for a rare classic mojito for myself and a freshly squeezed apple juice for him. We Not only got a refreshed perspective but have been plugged in to connecting with people more as individuals and as partners. I have finally gotten an increase after 3 years like hellllloooh. I have been reading loadz of books lately. And have been working strategically in my workosphere.
Comments down below if anything relatable popped up for you. Xoxo A courage’s T 
Scribbles from my Journal

How I got Shakarized for 8 Years and Counting

Oh Yeah we celebrated our 8 year Anniversary. Whoop Whoop. Now Let’s not all get Belgian Waffel and Nutella Happy… It is all great to embrace love and romance but the core of it has no filter and becomes the result of a forever kind of love.

This is not a beautiful disaster blog post. This post is all about how we survived 8 years and counting. 

Shaka the bae has been a huge chunk of my blog. Mainly because my blogs are lengthy extracts of real life experiences and the relationships formed there of.  Don’t worry if you a new friend don’t be scared I won’t write about you without your consent… Nudge Skru skru

If you need a backdrop and are new to my blogosphere. I would pride the tone of my blogs on My Lengthy Convo Series

We were far from a power couple… Yip you read right we were the couple with a match and a candle than that of electricity

Here’s what you know about Shaka . His a great friend that dared dating me when most people never approved . I’m talking friends and family. Rightfully so due to the slight gap in age during the time we met. I was quite young he was a senior and I was at a Junior in High School.
Calm down I know this seems a bit tense but I was matured for my age haaaaaaah ha ha okay okay I know that lame line won’t justify the fact. Nevertheless let’s behave…When I was in this ship with no place to land. I couldn’t describe my intentions unless I lived it.I didn’t have the courage or the confidence to explain to everyone why and how this was going to work for me. All I had was myself and my belief in him to at least try.  I also knew then that words are just sketches on a t-shirt . You truly need to experience whether you can stand on your own intention before you can convince anyone else. The same went for him as it went for me . So ranting and raving was sooooh not going to be beneficial for anyone.

The biggest Secrete I kept was dating him

People don’t respond to the whimsical intentions you have they only get it when you show them . Right actions speak louder than words always.  So I will let the cat out of the bag and just admit that I cleared out all the nay sayers by lying to them and pretending to call it quits between Shaka and I. Yip what we shared was just between him and I . I know this was a hard decision but in that frame of mind I did what I thought was best yet a risk at the same time.  No one knew not even Mrs Lewis got the ins and outs. Mrs Lewis A.K.A the best friend for 19 years and counting.  We have the best bond ever yet we the typical bestie bunch that had our not on “speaking term” moments too you know. This lasted a year and a half guys the longest we haven’t chatted at all.
I missed her every single day while venturing into a love fest but also a partnership with Shaka. We kept our relationship a secrete for at least two years. That wasn’t long enough because my high school bud placed a prediction on us and I quote “Give it 3 years and your love will run dry” That really stung in the best way because I could have easily been one of those girls. Who could easily be negative towards relationships.  Which makes no sense because relationships are ultimately a personal experience.No bystander could possible know the true intimacy shared between two people but people do this all the time. Ever since that encounter I never dared predicting any relationship I was introduced too.

 Do you want my advise ?

If you had to ask me relationship advise today I would lead you to this link over here. This gives you a sum of how we need to take responsibility for the advice we take or give ourselves. I am a good sound board  hearing people out is one of my best qualities but the ultimate decision lies with you.  Whatever the advice might be that you know in your heart you should follow…I am not the type to preach this is what you should do and in no way do I promote dating older guys when you young. This is just my personal encounter and the decisions I have made that have led up until now . Our relationship proved its truth all by its self . It demonstrated the personal intimacy in friendship we share more predominately than the lovey Dovey things.

How we pulled this off?

This was our best few years together. We communicated well I was so vulnerable with him. And I can’t fuss enough about what a gentlemen he was and sorter still is. So we sneaked around to see each other right. You still with me? Hang in there it is about to get steamy guys.
I was actively plugged into school. I was a prefect . I was on the RCL , drama clubs and Spades which was similar to Life Choices. So I had leverage in the stories I could come up with just to see him. School closed at 3ish PM on an ordinary school day. I would have just an hour I could get away with. I would say that I have to stay after school for blah blah blah. If I really needed to stay after school I would sacrifice both intervals and do whatever needed to be done just to sneak away with him.
One of the places we would go to is just the local library. We would walked down each aisle so slowly and stare at each other which felt like forever. We would just chat while wanting to hold each others hands but never did.  We went home and texted and he asked me if he could kiss me or hold my hand before we ever did. He never made me feel uncomfortable he always asked my permission before we went down any road. I knew then that this guy was different he had potential to be the possible boyfriend.

“She probably slept with him right? Why would she go through all this lying against the people closest to her”

We spent a while just being close friends before we made it official well I guess it became official when I started lying to everyone. And let me just tell you even during this time we never did go all the way. I am just putting it out there because it would be easy to assume oh well the only reason I lied was because we did it and I was sooooh attached like come on no.

Why was he worth disappointing everyone?

What inspired me to lie and go all in to give us a chance was this. He wanted all cards out on the table of what our intentions were. Like these words came from his mouth. He wanted to know where I was at and where I am hoping to head with him . We had this grown up conversation and he was being serious. He truly had set the tone of our relationship in this instance.  I knew in this moment he had potential to be the first boyfriend. I had flings before.Guys I had the hots for but my parents were very old school and none of these hotties were prepared to sit up with this but Shaka was. I told him this is what came inside my luggage and he accepted who I was and what came with me

My Mom literally chased him Home from the doorway of her’s

The first time he came to my moms house was an epic disaster.  I am not even going to go down this road all I will say is that any mother should have reacted that way. We got caught. I was left with no choice there was no way we could recover from getting caught after going to a club at 15 years old while being with this older guy. Oh MY HAT YES I KNOW PLEASE GROUND JUST OPEN UP AND SWALLOW ME IN.

What it was like sneaking around can you imagine?

During this time we never had the influence of anyone steering our ship. We rocked the boat with just each other. We had no money never went on a proper date for the first two years just our sneaky get away to a library and memories in his moms home.  I cant remember him having a stable job till after I ended High School. He wasn’t one of those guys with a great reputation in academics. He came to school late and never did his home work. He failed the 11th grade. He wasn’t on paper ideal for me. He was the captain of the athletics team but the reputation jocks have the odds was against me. Despite the noise I found a heart of gold and a gentlemen.  Whenever we would spend time at his moms home. He would always make me a cup of tea with a saucer with the spoon along side to dip my tea bag. Like whaaaat what guy does that ? Well a gentlemen right.

We never had a proper date as I have mentioned in 2 years no “lets get milkshake somewhere”because of being afraid of that third eye squealing on me.

So celebrating our 8 year Anniversary we had a dinner for two to spite the old days.  We had a really good evening at Eatalian’s restaurant we spoiled ourselves with desert treats and explored the Micheal Angelou lounge and shopping mall at night. It was simply stunning….

 

 

health · Scribbles from my Journal

Moments with Lizel

Have you ever met someone whom you could totally NOT imagine yourself being good friends with. Fast forward nearly 3 years later . Well that is pretty much the start of how I met Momentswithr&l.
I always point out reference to her blog but let me tell you more about the author from my perspective.  A few months after I started my blog Lizel my dearest collegue was finally convinced about giving blogging a go. Today we are not just colleagues but blog besties.

Today’s post is all about our friendship and how giving things a go could shift change in your life for the better

If you don’t already know by now I am about that positive vibe. What’s the worst that could happen? Outweigh your options and give your gut a good work out.
When I first started working at a new branch via my relocated transfer. I didn’t know what to expect. I was in a new city in a different work culture . Like the culture shock was real you guys!In cape Town we appreciate lunch time and fully embrace it. In Johannesburg the work culture particular to Sandton there is no such thing, you have a meal at work just so that you have enough energy but the rest of your work schedule… It’s all work honey.  Adapting to this and a few friendly smiles was an adjustment .
Lizel then was fragile and “insecure”… This would be a safe word to use.She had difficulty in speaking confidently. Clients and some of our colleagues would know just how to rattle her and she would brush off the awkwardness harshly .
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However who she has grown into today is way different from the space we met in. She not only grew more confident from within but also outwardly changed the tone at our outlook towards working with Lizel.
The setting I had while starting to work in this new environment was a female superior who was an ice princess. An energetic male superior who I just found confidence oozing from. A male senior in the same position as myself and two older colleagues and then lizel with another female collegue in the same bracket as the young blood squad . We were about 3 that were the same aged kiddos. Complete opposites in this work work work battle field. I was fairly new to everyone and the only person from out of the city.
In the line of work we in there is no time for being insecure or fragile so I never wanted to be friends with someone like lizel . To be honest I sympathized for her cause I remember being in her shoes for just a minute however I bounce back quickly .Unfortunately we don’t all bounce back the same.Yet I was friendly towards her at a distance.
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It took nearly a year to past and a lot of our old squad members had  left .Either into a different  industry or they transferred to different locations .We were then left with just each other and a few of the old seniors in our court.
The two of us are the same in age group from the remaining squad we had. This was when we had just each other to turn to .  We had a sense of familiarity and unspoken trust. We both felt the coming and going of those who surrounded us and have been witness to each others growth . I do recall the first few moments she walked into work with confidence and defended her arguments .
That’s the day I recognized a potential friend . I loved who she was but more who she was becoming. She was pure in her fragile state , She never wanted to step on people’s toes and would spare their feelings in sacrifice of her own emotions. This is good characteristics to possess but not at the expense of your own worth you know what I mean.
She was begining to realise her own potential and measure her worth by the respect she deserved . We became close in the parameters of our work station and we shared lunch .
Giving a friendship a go in my work space made room for a friendship to blossom into my personal life . Thus being the same friendship I would have never intended on having nor imagine blooming on a personal scale.
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When people show up for you when you don’t expect it that’s when you realise that they are there. There as in actually being present for you.  I was having a hard time in my personal life as a result I stayed out of work from having these rushes of panic attacks so servely it would debilate me , She took the time texting me the sweetest get well messages and genuinly sending love to me . I knew this was sincere by the effort it took on the computerized paint program. The different colours and shapes. It is so unfortunate that I don’t have it physically saved but it lives in my heart forever .
Another few times of being ill she drove me to the Dr and would pick me up from my home . No gift could repay that sense of kindness . We then became slightly closer and learned knew ways of nurturing what we had. We shared gifts and shared meals and finally had shared an ultimate girls trip and sleep over .
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We would have never been friends outside work.  If we had met in different circumstances. The odds would be pretty high but in this case giving our friendship a go worked out for the better .
We spent an evening at her living pad I met the bae who you would know all about by catching up on her blog post.
We watched crossroads together for like the 11th time on our own but the first time together. We got an epic roof top picture. We had a picnic and went to the botanical gardens.
We are opposites in so many ways but giving this a go would have been worth the memories than judgement from the corner of my eye and dirty looks . You know the usssssssuge drama girls have when they don’t give each other a chance .
These are just a few of the exceptional moments we recently shared. Do give her blog a browse if you Vibing with her blog style . Do click follow.
Share your thoughts down below if you have similar experiences and dare to ask yourself who in your life is worth taking a shot at ?
Scribbles from my Journal

Let’s pick up where we left off

It has surely been a while but let me start by saying how I have missed you. As per my last blog post. I challenged myself to a 30 day blogging challenge . I have been taged by a blogging bud and it started off amazingly.  Moments with R&L is a fairly new blogger and her fresh and edgy perspective kept me going. You have to read more about her over here.

I threw in the towel at day 21. I know right? So close yet so far. Up until day 21 sticking to this challenge became a lot more challenging as it should. To be honest it  revealed to me so much in the mist of my exhaustion and writers block. I found a sense of purpose for my blog in particular. A lot of the topics should have excited me in ways the post should have been 2000 words or more. For example what’s in my handbag? I love watching those videos and reading other people’s blogs regarding that sort of thing. But it wasn’t my thing or at times when I felt forced to write and ended up doing so half heartedly .

What I took away from the 30 day challenge ?

I had to go back to the drawing board and measure the why’s and what’s about being a bornfreewitht online. Which was perfect! Never be discourage by failing publicly or privately . Guys in all fairness I could have pushed through but I wasnt determined right ? I could have made this challenge my b!#$& but I didn’t have the willingness it took. So this is what I learned . Always see failing as an opportunity to grow. That is exactly my thinking. I now have a clear perspective with what I should be challenging myself and my readers. I have learned that my limit was way to low and my standard of giving up should be a bit higher. I am sure you can relate if one thing goes wrong in your day your attiude start spiraling out of control and more things result in distress.

I have to say this 30 day challenge opened a can of worms . I was amazed by the topics that were thought provoking and that puzzled me for a bit. I loved reading through those past days cause I am reminded how I had no idea where I was headed initially with whatever topic of the day I was approaching. It was really cool getting creative with my experiences and what I had to offer the topic and the challenge. I would still dare you to try challenging yourself for 30 days . Especially if you new to blogging. It might set boundaries for you. You get to discover what you comfortable with. And whether you down for half hearted post. How far you can push yourself and even explore new limits to quitting.  Sometimes it is never about what you fail at or how to measure what you going through its more of how you feel about what you failed at or what you experiencing.

Ever see someone go through the same thing you have gone through but their reaction is the complete opposite to yours . It’s because their feeling is not the same. It’s all about the feels .

About a lengthy one with Nay

At the start of challenging myself  the past month felt shakey for me . I was frustrated in work and my personal life and to my rescue came a beautiful mentor. Our relationship flourished and started by The connect group say what! Have a go at my post detailing the Connect group experience . I almost ended up not going and if I hadn’t . I would have never met Nay. Nay is a gorgeous soul that truly identifies the potential women in me. Our friendship is really indescribable but I will try. I am her about 5 years ago . Where I am at she has been. We met for an afternoon tea party. The first time I had anyone over to our new place since moving. Shaka and I are always out and about with our peeps. So as you can imagine the setting was very intimate, personal New but not awkward in anyway. We haven’t had one on one time before. I started pueking verbally with where I was at in my life how I was feeling. She had recently filmed a testimony of her experiences with our church’s creative team. I unfortunately missed it and so had she. It was played on the screens in church on a Sunday we both hadn’t been present in service . So after having verbal diarrhoea she intervened and said I need to show you something a friend had sent her a clip that was played in church about her sit down interview. And as we watched it together . Everything I had just uttered was an exact reflection of her journey . I was so amazed . We different in so many ways but we found common ground in our 20 something approach to life . Our conversation this late afternoon was a turning point to my month. It opened doors for me.  It gave me a fresh perspective . My mom and I had hour long conversations around this time . I despreatly needed maturity from women who lead by example . To give you an outline I was dissapointed in myself this affected my vibe with shaka and it was a hard time dealing with new experiences I was finding difficult. I didnt know how to resolve them and it became overwhelming to a point. This challenged me in areas a bit more personal than the pages of this blog. Nay’s lengthy Convo gave me courage to be more honest with myself. I had a tendency to sugar coat how I am really doing but she made me so comfy in being raw and unedited . It felt freeing to share things that one would  be more reserved with. I have a feeling Nay will be a feature on this blog more than I realise but I had to share how powerful just doing something can be . Just ending up going to something you might feel hesitant about. What having one on one time with someone could really mean. How freeing being honest with someone can help you and not intimadate you.  It just takes that one push in doing it whatever it is. A call an invite an attendance .

Guard the doors you open. Not all doors can be good for you. But find wisdom in the experiences of life and you will just know . When you open yourself up to people it can shift the tone to the hopes of your life. I can vouch for that. Opening myself up to you gives me hope that you can find refuge in my 20 something voice. Since Nay and I met a few connect sessions later and the usual day to day. Here is what’s to come. A sorter update down below.

What to look forward to

I celebrated my 8 year annivrsary with Shaka it was so sweet. Nicky who I will chat about in my next post gave me life in a day similar to   Friday the 17th. Moments  with R& L and I had an epic girl time adventure. Oh yeah !look forward to our post detailing  our sleep over and roof top picnic. I Recieved an invitation to Sisters of Africa’s conference which is taking place this week over a 3 day course. Lip Synch Sandton take the city had Shaka and I by the balls… I will save the magic of it in post all later this month.

So be sure to plug in and say Hi , comment down below if any of the above has you in feels . I have been reading a great book. In my absence in posting I have been browsing through WordPress and discovered cool bloggers.

It is the start of spring a new chapter and summery do over . This month is going to be a great one. xoxo T

30 Day Challenge

Day 21 Fav Tv Show and why?

I am not as obsessed with Tv time as I use to be. Thanks to the power of the Internet. If you miss an episode you won’t necessarily kill yourself but you can download episodes or interact with an online stream.

As a 90s kid there are tons of Tv Shows that drew me in.  What I like about you . How I met your Mother , Friends , Backstage ,  Chuck. Dude we could be here all day.

Something that I have grown with from my teens and even now in my 20s. Is the modern take of the Brady Bunch with Sass and positive vibes, Drum roll , feathers and Champagne bottles popping.

Keeping up with the Kardashian Yassssss.

Why? why not?  I feel like that show encapsulate the personal drama we experience day to day. Ever feel like your best friend betrayed you boom I had the feels over here.  Ever been there for someone and tried helping them but they can’t help themselves boom over here. Ever feel misinterpreted well duh click over here. Ever want to not Care and just live. Ever feel the need to be silly and joyous because you appreciate someone. Ever dream of a perfect Vakay and it doesn’t go as planned.

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All images found from eonline entertainment

Comment down below what your fav Tv show is?

30 Day Challenge

Day 20 What is in my bag?

Well What is in your hand bag? I am curious. I kid you not I love watching these sort of Youtube Videos. See down below for my fav.

WHAT’S IN MY BAG?! | Estée Lalonde – YouTube

Jan 21, 2016 – Uploaded by Estée Lalonde

WATCH MY LATEST Q&A!! https://youtu.be/MVgTg_mKtfA TACO TALK // ON THE MIND! https://youtu.be

WHAT’S IN OUR BAGS? | Estée Lalonde – YouTube

Jan 22, 2017 – Uploaded by Estée Lalonde

Estée Lalonde …. And yes if you use the, in my way, “regular” tampons you always have to wash your …

What’s in my Bag? | Estée Lalonde – YouTube

Nov 24, 2013 – Uploaded by Estée Lalonde

Don’t miss out and subscribe! » http://www.youtube.com/EsteeLalonde Subscribe to my vlog channel Everyday …

Yesss I know I am a little obsessed with Estee Lalonde 

I have no excuse for those of you who were expecting an on time published post. I am so sorry I failed at day 20. I mentioned on Thursday that I was on a mini work vakay. I spent 4 days at home. Shaka the bae and I had lots of couple time. Sleeping in and being out and about. More than usual. We had a great time. So great that I was too exhuasted to publish my post on time.

Momentswithr&l My blogging bestie and I have been prepping for major girl time.

We had a few set backs in our plans. But I promise this kinda stuff is worthwhile in the end. I’m about to meet her bae whom you have to learn more about on her blog over here. A hint on our friendship catch up on my previous post here.

Extract from 

Day 17 of a 30 day blogging challenge

  • Lizel and I have had some epic moments . Our friendship has matured in ways I never expected .

Today’s Challenge : What’s in my handbag

  • Wallet
  • Keys
  • Cell phone (work )
  • Tablet (personal)
  • asthma pump
  • Calmex/rescue remedy
  • hand sanitizer
  • Tech kit portable charger earphones adapters
  • Tissues
  • Lady products in case the robots turn red
  • Note book
  • Bible

These are items I normally have in my bag to work on a daily. When its my off day half of it gets put away. Like my tech items or my bible lady products cause I won’t be away from Home too long. Both devices are not always a must when its an off day.  But work can be annoying almost always for otp’s and such.

What’s in your handbag in the comments below 

30 Day Challenge

Day 19 Regrets

Haaay beauts hope you well. I would love to know what you have been up to. The weekend has been so good for me it feels like it is here to stay.Although time is passing through.My note to myself is to priortize what matters most to me. I had a pretty good day balancing my To do list.  To be honest it is Not always the norm but a great start for the blog I suppose . Kudos to me and kudos to you if you share the feels too.

If you enjoying my blogging challenge share your thoughts down below. If you dare to try a 30 day challenge get a bud to join you like mine MomentswithR&l .She’s been doing so well on her blog page . You should give her blog a browse.

Today’s challenge is about a huge Regret

I do believe that your mistakes help shape you. You do better when you know better.  The truth of it comes with maturity. However if there had to be something I would do over. It would be showing love from a very little age. I struggled being affectionate because it was not my norm. My close circle are not touchy touchy folks.

As I grew older my girl pals would hug a lot.  We would hold hands and share cheek kisses when we greeted each other.  I wish I had done that with my cousin’s and friends . I wish I hugged every adult who impacted me. Every time my grandparents spoiled me I wish I showed more gratitude than what I had before. Whether it was a smile and outter choice of words to say I love you . Especially those I appreciated at a young age . I wish I never appreciated and showered them with silence. Silence is golden. If anyone spoke of another person who I loved in a bad light. I wish I had not remain silent. That is not love right guys?. If I love someone I shouldn’t love them in the closet. When you see something say something. And as a kid I hold tons of memories remembering instances like that. It could be not standing up for a friend a peer at school or a mentor. I could have loved more.

Today I am still learning and wanting to experience love in all its dimensions. With strangers and my inner circle. Acquaintances and loving myself. This regret is a big wave to ride but this was mine .

What is your philosophy on regrets leave comments below 

 

30 Day Challenge

Day 18 of My 30 day Blog Challenge Let’s talk about a book

Quick catch up: It is surely Friday and it has been a cold one in Sandton over the pass two days. The cold front has found foot at our door step and despite being on a long weekend . I have given in to not doing much for the day. My initial intention while being off from work was to not waist the day but to do as much as I can. In my head not waisting the day entails doing something worth remembering or at least productive. Let’s blame the cold front lol but seriously I slept in late . Shaka was given orders to bring a cup of tea to bed. I checked in with MomentsofR&L via whatsap. I had Jlo on the playlist while enjoying Shakas light breakfast which you don’t want to know . Or should I dissapointment you …Well basically left overs of last night’s meal reheated. His not one to cook from scratch. To be honest not long after I fell asleep. Eventually woke up after sleeping in. Gave myself a bath a long pamper session.  A quick snack and I was off to Church happenings. My evening ended off super cool. Tonight at Rivers our Church we had Sisters and Shaka had a boy’s night at the men’s section. I am Man. I hope that where ever you found yourself this Friday you are being good and safe and out of trouble.

Today’s blog challenge is titled : A book you could read on loop

Now I am the type of girl who has a rule that if I can’t page through my bible as much as I would a secular book then I won’t do a book. I love self help books but nothing recent comes to my mind as much as this one .

Animal Farm

Oh yeah we have either paged through this one ourselves or cheated in class while our English School teachers did all the reading for us. A popular book followed by schools globally.  At high school we read this in our 10th grade I guess. While reading this I was so intrigued by almost every sense of this book. The amount of times it was rejected by publications. The fact that it won an award long after the author passed on. The politics and origin. The context and 21st century parallel. Dude I could go on and on. All I have to add is who my fav characters were . It has to be Clover and Boxer . Clover had this feminine approach towards every incident that occurs in this novel. Her sincerity and loyalty . Compassion and affection towards Boxer my fav as well. Boxer showed strength humility and courage. He reminds me of the qualities my grandparents possessed. This is a must read if you haven’t. This was the best part of my educational experience. I loved geography and business with a passion. However nothing intrigued me more than dissecting this book. A classic indeed.

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Comment down below if you have read this book and what your thoughts are

30 Day Challenge

Day 17 of a 30 day blogging challenge

The weekend is upon us boos. Hope you ready to unwind .This is going to be a long weekend ahead for me. I have been off from work since today. I know right lucky me. I am back in work mode next Monday. What I do have planned is firstly pushing through this blogging challenge.  Hope you enjoying it so far. I know myself and my blogging bud Momentswithr&l are having a ball of a time. Secondly it is My 8 year anniversary month with Shaka so we will ease into some couple activities.  Tomorrow morning a mean breakfast in bed is planned.  Cuddling will be a must as the cold front finally arrived. We have been dreading the windy weather but thats okay. We surely plan to warm up. We have tons of Movies to watch. A game night some time this weekend. A walk to the Zone church festivities and we competing in a lip synch battle . I will tell you more about that a bit later so be plugged in to post that will follow.

Today’s blog challenge entails a list of Highs and Lows that has taken place this year

Before we just get into mine. I feel like a good reflection Sesh with yourself is always necessary . If your lows are outweighing your highs. Guess what the year is not over yet. Each new day is a second chance at being better than yesterday.  The ball is completely in your court so remember it is up to you.

My 2017 lows:

  • This year started off rough. It was the first time after relocating we had to find a new place to live . Our lease came to an end . We had a pretty shitty landlord.  We gave notice 67 days in advance and was in search for a place since last year November.  If you have experience in the world of moving. You can sympathize what a schlep it is. We had no idea if we would find a place in time.A place we could afford a down payment for it as well. The cost involved to get your ish mobile. The traveling cost to view possible living spaces . At a point I thought we had no option but to couch on someone’s sofa or relocate back home .
  • I still work for the same company
  • I had to postpone my studies at the New York Film Aademy
  • As of yet let’s be real a huge low I have had no salary increase
  • The National Arts Council effed up International student funding. So I didn’t get financial aid for my studies after spending my last money at the time to travel to their offices just to hand my application form on time. I had to take leave hours and pay for each document to be printed.
  • Our new place shrinked in size compared to our first place.
  • The cost of living has increased majorly this year but we manage to pull through each month.All glory to God on this one.

Highs for 2017

  • We found a place 2 weeks before we had to be out the old apartment.Our new living pad is less than a km away from my work. We reside in the heart of Sandton.  Our New Landlord has been super awesome.
  • We grew folds in our Faith. I got baptized.  We joined a connect group. We partnered with the church. We attend all the cool events the church host as of lately. Such as Winter Nights and Celebrations. I attended my first Sisters evening Shaka attended I am Man for the first time. You can learn more about it on the links where applicable.
  • A high was indeed the way we perserved through our hard times. When we had to budget so tightly for our move. We literally walked kms just to view potential property. We walked to Paulshof from Rivonia there after to Fourways and back.On foot cause we had no money to waist. I sacrificed travelling money to work just in order to not be short of anything.  Shaka literally walked to my place of work so I wouldn’t walk all by myself at night from work home. Those nights were pouring rain. But I will never forget it and pressing through the difficulty of that . We can only thank god for it all .
  • Birthdays this year has been bomb in every way. Mine you can read more about over here. Shaka ‘s over here and Momentswithr&l here. I surprised my grandmother in July too. I haven’t written about it till now.  My family lives in cape town and unfortunately I couldn’t make her birthday by being present this year. She celebrated her 70 th. My relatives hasn’t really heard me sing before . So I sent a voice note that was played at the afternoon of her birthday party.  In front of close friends and family I had a message for her and a song I sang called The blood and her fav I know who I am. This was so special to me because this was truly from my heart and she really appreciated my gesture. According to my relatives I had them in tears so This meant everything .
  • Shaka and I have been way more spontaneous.  We go on long walks and have just had a sleep over at a friend’s place . We spend some late nights at my place of work together.His built a fun relationship with my co workers. We have tried new restaurants . We more social lately.
  • I started a blog say whaaaat.
  • I have mailed about 5 letters via post achieving those bucket list goals
  • I have become way better at cooking
  • I had my first breast ultrasound and am in good health down this alley.
  • Lizel and I have had some epic moments . Our friendship has matured in ways I never expected .
  • I have found the courage to get comfy in the truth of my life. I always use to pretend or cover up my flaws . I have learned the power and freedom that comes with telling the truth.
  • I attended my first cellular launch with my company The Samsung launch S8 Unboxing
  • The highs outweigh my lows and I am so grateful I can share bits and pieces of mine with you.
Thanks for hanging out with me today. All my love xoxo T
30 Day Challenge

Day 16 The story behind the old Picture

Good Evening babes. This is indeed a good start to the few days ahead. I just finished a 6 day brutual work schedule. However on the bright side there is a few free days ahead for me. So as you can imagine I am signalling all the good vibes for a “Mini vakay”.

Yesterday’s blog challenge detailed 15 interesting facts about yours truly.  Today is about elaborating on the story behind the picture. I decided to defend my facts by showing you cool old Pictures. These pictures were from my days dancing at epic shows and studios .

Be warned I beg of you to please excuse the sucky quality in those megapixels.

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This was taken in 2014. The bae and I got studio space at a Wellness Centre in Plumstead Cape Town. He taught dance professionally where as I the contemporary Girlfriend tagged along.  Shaka worked 3 jobs in Cape Town as the hustle of a professional dancer is real.  Below is what the gorgeous studio looked like. We paid rent without making much of a profit but loved every second of the hustle . And who wouldn’t love teaching these cute kiddos anyway.

 

I never saw myself as a professional dancer but I could dance to save my life . It has been a quick minute since I have even stretched and oh boy am I already far from a good split.

 

They say a picture holds a thousand words and it sure could. I remember being so happy here.  I felt that when love and creativity combined nothing could separate the magic that those moments possessed.  This was taken at his primary job. A performing art school where he taught hip hop dance in Paarl Cape Town. If you familiar with the route you can tell what a stretch that was. He surely travelled and worked hard to sustain a decent lifestyle .

 

This was a third job to Shakas resume . He taught in Athlone Cape Town on a Saturday of every week. He went on to compete In Las a Vegas at the Hip Hop International Dance Competition.  This is a legendary opportunity. He placed top 14 in the world from his category. He ranked All style dance champion in south Africa that year . He respresented the country and repped well. Because he was away I took over his class with Beyonce teasers. I taught a piece to the song grown women.

 

We met at school. Particularly because of our love for the performing art. High School was huge in itself. Especially for a first year  student. Bare in mind he was a senior and I was a junior.  I attended drama class and he taught dance . This was a weekend extra mural activity opened to the public just hosted at the high school.  I had no idea he even attended the school or was a senior. Until Mrs Lewis pointed that out.

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To be fair dance brought us both to Johannesburg Sandton. This was our first flight together.  We landed in Randburg Johannesburg for a dance competition.  This was in 2014 we had no intention that time of moving.  I can vividly remember not liking the atmospher and the environment.  Now I adore the streets of Johannesburg. 

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30 Day Challenge

Day 15 . 15 Facts about Me

Hey beauts hope you had a kick ass day. If you didn’t that’s A okay. Admit that the day sucked but don’t sulk in it. It might not be over but you can adjust the tone to it. As cheesy as it seems . Take a breath. Gasp in the bits of oxygen to  possibily wind down. Stretch . Keep moving. Take a walk outside even if it is just for 10 mins. Don’t be deflated in self pity .keep moving cause the world ain’t stopping for you. Please bare in mind this is in fact a note to you and more so for myself.

Today’s challenge is all about 15 interesting facts about me. Presumably ones that you can’t already find on my blog. you ready? Okay lets shoot.

  1.  I use to be a television presenter say what? You read right. I use to volunteer at an open studio program. This was recorded and aired through Cape Town Tv. They are a non profit Television Network. This session was opened to the public. You had the opportunity to host a talk show. The air time was about 30 mins. Excluding commercial breaks. I volunteered at the age of 17. At the age of 18 The opportunity started paying for a different show called Ek se . A teen program with the same Network.
  2. I can dance to save my life . I attended contemporary and African dance workshops. I obviously did Hip Hop as well thanks to Shaka.
  3. I Recieved contemporary dance training through Jazzarts outreach programs and private workshops
  4. I taught kids how to act. Dramatic arts in 2013 A voluntary summer boot camp. I hosted this with a local community centre.  Kids attended throughout a 4 day free mahala class.
  5. I did tons of other community projects . I started my own voluntary community page . Targeted especially for teens . Volunteering from a young age gave me great persepctive.
  6. The first time I volunteered in the community was in grade 7. I was 12 going on 13.My English school teacher took us to the frail care centre.  Since then I have volunteered at the same place more than 4 times.
  7. I currently work in the communication industry / retail division.
  8. My occupation is sales customer care consultancy admin and all the goods of being an acting assistant manager on occasion.
  9.  When I first visited Johannesburg I said hell to the no I would never live here.
  10. This one will be fun only one person in my family motivated me to press through in Jhb at times I wanted to call it quits. That aunt is Adele. Read more about her over here.
  11. I started dating Shaka at the age of 15. Yes shocker don’t judge me . No wonder I have written about how much my family so was not impressed by him.
  12. A lot of foods I dislike I have tend to enjoy when I grew older . Examples Mushrooms , cooked carrots , milk and soup.
  13. I had more than a few anxiety attacks since the age of 14.
  14. I have written journals devoted to my sister and my God daughter. They all based on the things I learned since I left High School.
  15. I have only appreciated my up bringing till I moved away from Home .