Scribbles from my Journal

Living in Sandton Johannesburg

It has been two years since living in Sandton.  And Girrrrrl let me tell you this has not been the easiest road. I felt I voiced a lot of relatable experiences in my lengthy Convo series. That I wanted to start a New One based off living away from Home as a 20 something year old.

 

Hold Up Wait a Minute let me put my 2 Cents in it

When I relocated from Cape Town I was the first among my peers to dare. I just had my Matric certificated failed attempts at studying. A job in the communication / retail industry and a heart full of enthusiasm for all and more.

My bae Shaka and I were on the edge of dreaming big. I mean bigger than we ever had before.  To move in together. To travel together and hustle together for more. We had not much too loose but our rooms in our parents home.  I guess our dignity if we had to fail. But  ahduh if you don’t know this yet then let me tell you. Failing is growth so either way there wasn’t that much at stake.  You can’t learn from something you haven’t failed at .

Shaka has traveled many times before. I on the other hand did not.  His been to Germany , Las Vegas his been to Jhb More than I can remember. He has traveled on temporary basis  but living in another city is a whole other dimension and to do this together was a New experience for each one of us.

We were dating for 5 years in already.  We never had on and off break up’s . But we  always toughen up through any one of  our fair share ” running on empty experiences”. You know what I mean?  We were past  the infatuation stage and ready to venture big in the real world.

 For more on what it was like relocating click over here

Brace yourself you in for a lengthy one grab a cup of Tea

I am one of those control freaks who is set on being my version of successful. I like so many others dared to relocate for my version of success. I am still trying to figure out what exactly that is. All I know is that right now I am not even close to it

Sandton compared to where I am from is way more

  • Diverse (most people living in Sandton are from all corners of Africa and beyond)
  • People are genuinely more friendly
  • Yes it is a faster pace life compared to Cape Town (Things happen quickly All executive decisions starts here. One Minute people are on a flight and then they back in the office) It is speedy gonzales
  • The opportunities are insane (in every good way) Think about it Sandton is the heart beat of South Africa’s economy
  • Work Culture is lit in so many ways (lunch is so not a thing people don’t just go to work and go home. There is always a network sesh or social happening during the week)
  • Lifestyle is way more than just your personal taste in things. Especially here. The lifestyle in Sandton is about connection and people and wait for it… Travel
  • Success is all around Sandton it never feels far from you

There are a ton more but to give you the just that is my core of why I am still here.

The struggle is Real

My Only heart felt struggle is that I am not synced into any of the above. I am still trying to figure my life out . I found difficulty to thrive in any of the above. I must be doing something wrong. I cant be in the space that I am in. With all that surrounding me and not be flourishing with all the areas I have mentioned.

  • Finding a different company to grow in was a major thing to do on my list of thriving
  • Earning a ton of money in order to save and study or travel ties into this
  • Networking I am getting way better at. Learning how to not just be friends with friends but to find the courage to actually build contacts from those friendships.  I know people who know people but I have never been strategic to thrive with my friendships. I seriously don’t know whats wrong with me. I am afraid I guess of people assuming I want to use them. #OverthinkerStruggles

I feel that for the past two years and counting so much cool things has happened and I have grown a ton but In terms of my goal flow I am in the same place as before . I haven’t been achieving the “big stuff”.

There have been a few times where I was just too hard on myself and of course wanted to throw in the towel over here

I had a lengthy Convo with my Mom a few days ago. About this and things we generally don’t talk about. This was a 45 min call . I was on the roof top of where I work .  I Had a good cry and just soaked in the energy of the sunset and busyness of  Sandton. The sun was a gorgeous pink with red and yellow undertones . People were literally walking below the building with suite cases on their way to the Gaustation. The horizon of the skyscrapers were finding rest while the work day came closer to an end. Traffic was at it’s peek already and on the other side of the building you could view the peacefulness of the residential estates.

To be honest I am puzzled I just came through piecing my emotions together. This Blog space is the coolest ventilation machine ever. Sharing this for the heart that is meant to read it. Blows breath into my journey. I shared this with you guys because I know what it is like to get advice from a turtle instead of a giraffe.  You can’t explain to a giraffe what a turtle can only understand. Td Jakes couldn’t have said it any better over here

You wanna move down ?

 By all means I say do it.  You don’t have to move here permanently.  You can always transfer back to wherever home is for you. I haven’t met any one my age that wanted to be here till the end of time. We always yearning for more. I see myself settling down in Cape Town. But I feel comfortable here now. Of course I don’t want to be here for quite too long. The bae and I do want to travel and live and work abroad.

 My advice

Things never go according to plan & our paths won’t be alike if you had to try. A lot of my friends found Job success way quicker than  I did. Some never liked it. But from my experience there is more positives than negatives that came out of daring to do this.  You live you learn and grow.  It is always easy to attain everything. The hard part is to maintain it kinderish but what is even harder is to afford to have more.

The following is normally factors to consider when relocating things I thought about but didn’t fathom until I experienced it myself.

Traveling 

I have had many instances where I was in the position well we were , the bae and I. To splurge on a car but we both live and work walking distance from work. So was it really going to be beneficial? We want to travel and we were both in agreement that we don’t need a car right now and right here. Public transport I have never had an issue with around Sandton. When we need to travel a bit further out we go along with friends Uber or Sleep Over. Young Wild and Free Vibes.

Crime

I have never felt uncomfortable or unsafe around Sandton. Of course their are incidents that occur like everywhere else. I read the Sandton Chronicle.  But nothing dramatic traumatized me other than my own emotional drama like I can never win chants.  Fortunately where I have always lived. We have boom gates and private security. My previous studio apartment came with a panic button , home alarm , gate control. But remember nothing is guaranteed. You just have to be cautious and use your common sense to avoid crime. We were at a bar once in Braamfontein. We had a great time and then there was this obvious drunk f@!% who wanted to get slutry with me. And we just left and went to a better bar that we wouldn’t have found if that never happened.  So remain positive at all times.

Rentals

Look there are places that are expensive and there are places which is reasonable. Our first studio apartment was in Rivonia which was super convenient for work and traveling.  We paid R4400 for an open plan studio living pad. We had a garden pool and tennis court. Security. Laundry could be done on the premises.  This included water and electricity. Partial furniture was added too. It was enough room for the two of us. We had  and spacious if we had people over. The landlord was just such and ass. Over time as per normal rent does increase and you just get over all your landlords B@!3s%&*

Living Expenses

Compared to Cape Town Spaza shops is not a thing around Sandton. Spice shops are ridiculously over priced here compared to home. Here is no stores like Shoprite Pep or Makro. You have to travel out. In a nutshell food and essentials watch out for checkers and PnP  and WoolWorths specials. They worth the pocket change that you will have left.

Ask For help

People are generally willing to guide or advice you if you had to ask. Reach out to people in a sincere manner. I know what it is like to be in a new town overwhelmed by your own expectations. I had so much pride I eventually had steam coming from my ears after running empty not knowing how to cope at times I feel like I have failed. Try chatting to a stranger which is quite normal that’s how friendly people are here. Your uber driver the gaubus driver. The person next to you on a bench. Most times they respond to you in a non judgmental way.

Call Home

Those calls home meant everything to me especially in the beginning before things even got hard. I feel like it’s always best to not call just when you in trouble but make up for the time missed out. Ask what’s for supper. How your grandparents health are. If there is anything new and how the things are that may be old. Besides people cant help but share tragic news either which are golden convos that remind you why you in a new place and never loose sight of that ultimate reason. No matter how home sick you are. Video calls are the funniest. Pretending to fake phone freeze. The time whatsap call had no audio and I would write down my response on post notes and show it to the camera.

In case of Emergency

Have that savings account for that emergency rush to the hospital or flight home whatever. Get that credit card and be wise with it. Also have your ducks in a row register a local gp in your new city and keep your secondary gp at home. Find out what your registered hospital is for your medical aid plan. Update your emergency contact No. Have a emergency list in your new home. For private cabs or the local police station. Whatever you can think of in case of emergency. Have them thought out practically.

 

 

 

 

Advertisements
Scribbles from my Journal

Top 10 Entrepreneur Secrets

How to stop being just an employee by Keith Camelon Smith

This is a bit different for me. This is a sort of Book review but real talk entrepreneurship session. If you read Sticky Situations in Sandton.  You will know that after high school I struggled. I knew I couldn’t go study like everyone else. I needed to get a job. More importantly I needed to gain experience because everyone was looking to hire someone with experience.

 It was really tough I tried a lot of things. That year 2013 I sat at home basically unemployed.  I wasn’t really at home all day but that’s what they say when you don’t have a permanent J.O.B. I would go with Shaka to the library and apply to available vacancies and varsity even though I knew I had no money. I applied to nonpaying internships. A lot of the places I mailed never advertised nonpaying internships.  I just requested anyway. While I was on Cape Town Tv . That’s right but for now let me digress. 

Start Up Company experience

I interned at a startup registered company called DMC. My role was to market this start up on social media. It was BEE registered. I was in the process of being signed up legally for shares. Even though the company wasn’t really making money yet. I just absolutely lived each day for this experience.

I went with them to apply for tenders. Went to the manufacturing and supply headquarters. I even got to attend seminars and SMME workshops .Every day we had something lined up.  I corresponded with sales and marketing divisions from local shopping center management.

 Learning the how to and being exposed to entrepreneurial culture.  I worked with the owners. For 4 months till things fell apart. I learned on the go however the co-founder gifted me this book How to stop being just an employee by Keith Camelon Smith. 

I read it from start to finish.  There is nothing complicated about this book. l felt that the language used was easily understandable for my age at the time . The lessons learned in the book can vary. It’s not only about how to be a better boss but how you as an employer view your employees.  What the difference is between the two also.

I read this book years ago. It was 2013 I was 19 years old. I wrote a few things down in my journal.

Here are a few tips from the book. 

  • Differences between rich and poor is the mindset. Your mind is more important than your bank account. Don’t measure your dreams by the value in your bank account. You can’t be a rich person with a poor mindset. 
  • Train yourself to have a rich mindset. Whatever the brain can conceive it can achieve .The mind is strengthened at its best when it overcomes fear .What are you afraid of failing? If you don’t fall you will never know how to get back up. It’s a part of learning and knowing how to do better. 
  • Business is about people and learning how to relate and communicate with people. 
  • Connect and communicate with people in ways that inspire them to take action

Not giving too much away. No spoilers alert. If you can give this book a go. It took me a total of 4 evenings. To read and comprehend and journal notes. I think this is relevant to your day to day job and blogging spirit. 

Comment down below if you know the entrepreneurial struggle. What self-help books has guided you xoxo T

Scribbles from my Journal

20 Things for My 20 something Bucket List

Oh Miss Golly Molly here it goes… My declaration to myself before you

First off if you don’t know Your girl Shameless you welcome. Shameless Manifesto you can find here 

Shameless Maya – YouTube

“What would happen if I shamelessly promoted myself for 365 days?” My channel started out as a social media experiment and now it’s a lifestyle. I hope my jo…

so why are we being introduced to Maya when I am suppose to tell you about how I am going to kick ass with my Bucket List. Well stating this online and doing this in my personal time. Is measured on two different scales.  Maya has helped me in my personal time. If she has for me then hopefully she can pull through for you. 

Sharing this with You

Today the 21 July 2017. I declare that I will Embrace My 20’s. I will live for working hard on meaningful ventures. I will be active in community & will love and connect with people around me.  I will see the world beyond the parameters of South Africa’s back doors. I won’t limit my dreams based on my bank account. I have 7 Year’s to complete my 20 something Bucket List.

In my previous post I have listed how I got this situation started. I have looked at 4 areas and have listed 20 “must do items ” that I will have to complete before I am 30.

Here is my 20 Something Bucket List

Embrace the 20’s

  1. Find my personal Fashion Style. To rock Tutus and take as many pictures that will last for the ages. Those vintage style images of my 20 something fashion Chronicles. If you cant go to fashion week be fashion week.
  2. Apartment Living Oasis . I always wanted a studio Apartment so now that I have been able to live in one. I really want to make effort into turning everyone of my living spaces into an oasis. Home Diy’s in door plants intentional decor and such.
  3. Host and Attend epic home dinner parties and game nights. I want to experience night life. Attend socials as often as possible.
  4. No matter how far away from Home I am . That I will always post letters to my girls. My best friend , my cousins, God Daughter and  baby  Sister.

Shaka

  1. We are going to live in L.A & The U.K before the end of our 20s This is our Bucket List B!@#$
  2. We have to do more fun things as far as possible. Anything spontaneous and childlike. Including Kissing more , having planned date nights hiking laying on grass all things apologetically fun!
  3. To study together whether it may be a short course or longer courses. Our licenses for scooters and cars or whether it is finishing his graphic designing diploma or a start of whatever my heart beats to get a degree in.
  4. Most importantly sharpen our faith. To be more active in all things Rivers (our church) and just know more about God together.

Community

  1. Get connected. When I moved to Sandton all my neighbors walls were gigantic we hardly knew our neighbors. I want to get to know my neighbors each one of them Even if they don’t like me.
  2. To vote and be registered in my community for elections
  3. Take on Charitable Projects which are self hosted
  4. To engage in community drives and activities

Relationships

  1. Host a big Christmas with Family & Friends
  2. To have quality time spend with people who surround me
  3. Talk more to my grandparents
  4. Have the ultimate Girls Trip

 Work

  1. Build a name in the digital Space
  2. To Build a community of online friends
  3. My goal is to create long lasting friendships from my online buddies
  4. #goals to grow this into a full time creative thing. Wouldn’t  it be ideal to have this your 9-5 job

if you haven’t tried a bucket list before well here is to a start of something new for you and me both. Comment if you find any common thread also drop down your bucket list adventures. Either done and dusted or jotted and attempted.I would love to hear your take on it.

Scribbles from my Journal

How to create a 20 something Bucket List

How easy is starting a Bucket List

At first I didn’t find doing a bucket list online as easy as everyone else . I really had to think about mine. I googled examples but I couldn’t relate to the first few samples I saw. Do you know the feeling?

Whenever I am puzzled in ways I want to find personal growth. I try and paper my thoughts. I take a step back from what I am doing. Scribble in my journal. Mind map where I am at.Make notes of What is it that I would like to be better at . The next obvious step is to be practical with the how and take action of course.

Real talk advice from a school Teacher

I learned this from a high school teacher. I remember being bitter at the way I looked . I was skinny and tall . I got tease for it. I had really bad acne I was insecure about not having a ton of friends like Mrs Lewis. And here is this teacher who is going on and on about making a list and to change the things you want to change . I was like how is a list going to change how I feel. Are you kidding me ? I was prim and proper during my Primary School Years but their would always be that skunk who would troll on my image. I don’t hold grudges  I am just expressive alllll…..right!

But really now making a list? This is not going to stop someone from saying hurtful things to me . I went to this teacher after class and I said what was on my mind . I expressed how personal and frustrating it was to hear that lesson when I felt like it was no good to me. Once I finished and she advised me . I was so relieved that I had said it. I blurred things out I wouldn’t generally say .

Saying how I felt was such a relief.  But I couldn’t always go to someone who I felt would appreciate my vulnerability. I didn’t want my teachers to see me differently.  I wanted to be known as responsible and a girl with great potential . Not someone who was troubled with insecurities.  So I journal-ed .

If you stuck journal on or try the accountable thing

Having a diary was hard because my grandmother would read it. Despite finding new places to hide them. When I found Shaka my bae . I finally trusted someone enough to share things with. I had a journal at his place . I kept dating him as a secrete too . Oh well that is a story for another day. We were not the ideal fit for my family and understandably so. He was much older than I was.

I still have the tendancy to be very private . I don’t confront anyone easily.  If I am in pain I have this natuarl urge to resist sharing my heartache with anyone because of how use to” keeping things private “has always been for me .

Consider the  times I told people how I felt and they ran off to share that to someone else . To get the just it would be a friend at school or church member or a relative . Yo alot of people in my circle did me wrong with privacy but I don’t love them any less. They are who they are. In the end this helped shaped me .

If you can relate drop your experiences down in the comments

Scribbles from my Journal

My 20 Something Bucket List

Every Part of me is going Nuts for this Post here is why?

Haaaay Babes if you have been enjoying my blog reads. I just want to say thank you for taking the time to catch up with me. I love making friends from across the globe on this platform. If you new a warm welcome to you. The best place to start is Sticky Situations in Sandton .

When you guys visit my site I always want you to feel like it’s about to go down lol

Here is what you need to know about this Blog Journey 

  • I am a growing blogger & You-tuber and that means we are
  • I am from Cape Town South Africa writing from Sandton Jhb
  • I am 23 years old  hence the 20 something convo’s
  • I am here to be what other bloggers has been for me
  • My topics are my personal experiences and creative things anyone can try.

Before Blogging I was a Scrapbook Queen

Before this blog or in fact before I was ever introduce to bloggers and Pinterest or other medium’s similar. I use to scrap book as a Kid. I would cut out all those bomb ass images. From date night Ideas , Fashion and whatever inspo spoke to me. I would paste these images in a scrapbook. Write little notes next to them. They would be something along the lines of how bad I want to experience a romantic memory or Why I need those boots. A lot of my unexpected memories I was proud to experience also went in my scrapbook. Like the first time I was on a train far away from home . Or my first flight ticket.

Scrap booking now

I still kinder nurture my scrapbook. I love having a browse through it especially  this past winter.  I feel like during these colder times when you particularly don’t want to be outdoors. This is a great artsy fartsy soul session for you. I will say there is nothing better than kicking it old school. There is something so satisfying about recreating a blank page into a hearty frame of hopefulness.

Bucket List

Anyhoo as I grew older I heard the term bucket list from the movie Bucket List. Over the years this has become such a thing. Unknowingly I had a bucket list compiled in my scrapbook.  Which later I started doing vision boards. I signed up for Pinterest and now I have decided to go public on my very own online diary.

Here is a few facts about Bucket Listing if you don’t already know . To be fair some of these I never knew until right now .

  1. The term bucket list means what
  2.  There are blogs dedicated to Bucket Listing
  3.  There are published books about Bucket List 

I can’t invest my time into things that don’t have intention or a depth of meaning. The worst thing is wanting something for myself that doesn’t add value to anyone else” but myself”. So I drew up a mind map of where I am right now and who I would like to be . Of course my bucket list is my how to. I don’t like to overwhelm myself with things I hope for when I am at grandma’s stage. So I put together  a practical yet daring “must do” on my bucket list .

I thought about where I am right now

  1.   I am Open to love private about sex. I have a long term bae Shaka
  2.  I am 23 years old living in Sandton Jhb
  3. I am from Cape Town Mitchell’s Plain A large township created by apartheid.Established in the 70s for “coloured people”. The township house middle income families facing socio-economic disadvantages. Example gansterism and drug abuse.
  4. I have a compassionate heart & want to offer my best to people
  5. My J.O.B I work in the communication industry. Sales & marketing strategist since 2014 in retail branches.

 

How I would love to grow

  1. Do more fun things with Shaka and take ourselves less seriously. To also grow in our faith together.
  2. To be active in my community whether it be in Cape Town or Sandton currently. To be politically active vote and be involved in community projects.
  3.  I want to better myself in areas I can grow in. Study and travel
  4.  To create an online name in the digital space. Growth on my blog and YouTube channel.
  5. To nurture relationships & connect more to people around me

I divided those areas into categories

 

  • Embracing the 20s
  • Community
  • Shaka
  • Relationships
  • Work

In spirit of being 20 something I have listed 20 “must do’s” on my bucket list. I divided 4 between each category.

If you have tried doing a bucket list leave your blog post or thoughts on your experiences in the comments below.  I would love to read up on yours xoxo T

To be continued

Scribbles from my Journal

Lengthy Conversations with my Best Friend

Lenghthy Convo is a Series on My Blog that detail a few lessons that I have learned from having” long conversations”. These conversations were personal encounters I shared with Family and Friends

Mrs Lewis

I can’t stop the beating heart of a 19 year friendship. Mrs Lewis is a huge part of my life and she will be a big chunk of my blog space so please catch up if you haven’t already.

We have been best friends for most of our lives . Our friendship of course experienced highs and lows. We had our not on “speaking term” moments . Our parents always prepped us for the time we would out grow each other. We complete opposites and have only a few things in common . My grandmother never liked my best friend for such a long time because of our differences so that conflict really added to our odds .

What worked in our favor was that we were each others first loves . We adored each other so much . We had great admiration for one another .She inspired me in so many ways , I inspired her too. We could dream big and not be ashamed of wanting similar things that felt impossible.

The thing is when we shared our crazy dreams with our other friends they would always want what we wanted . Or would bash our hearts desire’s and share them with their friends .They never safe guarded our dreams . Does this ring a bell to you?

Mrs Lewis and I protected each others fantasy and hopes. We kept them to ourselves.

 We could trust sharing things to each other that might have not made sense to everyone  else . We prayed  for each other more than we prayed for ourselves . We wrote letters and diary entries that would be kept at her house . In my home they wouldn’t be safe because my grandmother would always read through my journal . Our diary entries were never anything drastic it was just things that we wanted or how we felt and we never wanted anyone to shame us for the way we felt or the things we wanted .

We always had lengthy convo’s about all of the above .

We appreciated a unspoken pack that was made clear in our lengthy conversation.  When she told me anything hearty I knew I would treasure her vulnerability till the day I die. She didn’t even have to say please lets just keep this between us. This is why we don’t have to see each other 24/7. And hear from each other all the time , we shared an understanding that not just anyone could hack .

Lengthy meaningful convo’s were a great part of that.

Like I mentioned we were complete opposites. we had our own group of friends .For our 12 year of schooling together  . She would hang out with kids that I wouldn’t necessarily see eye to eye with but I always wondered why when all our friends were gone we would always find ourselves alone talking about things we wouldn’t normally chat to our daily friends about.

Those prayers letters and lengthy convo’s shaped they way I appreciate a great friendship today. We live in different cities currently she’s a wife and mom with a great job.  I am so lucky to have learned all that I have from our lengthy Convo’s

   “Best Friends are a promise not a label”

Comment below if you share a similar friendship or what great memories formed out of your lengthy convo’s with a best friend .

Scribbles from my Journal

Lengthy Convo with Shaka’s Mom

Mama Shaka

 Lengthy Convo Lessons

Lenghthy Convos is a Series on My Blog that detail a few lessons that I have learned from having “long conversations”. These conversations were personal encounters I shared with Family and Friends

Shaka My bae’s mom have a heart of gold . She can talk for hours . I have learned so much from her though .  They say a girl Chooses a guy who resembles her father and vice versa for a guy. As much as Shaka’s mom and I have a few things in common. We differ in ways I wish I could be more like her.

  1. She has patience
  2. She is a peoples person
  3. She loves doing things on her own

I am quite the opposite. I admire all those characteristics and have been trying to better myself.

I will admit there is way more to love about her than just the few that I admire . She raised a son who has a heart of gold too. This would top the rest .

She is so open . I could ask her anything. Lately I have sucked in staying in touch with her more. I have been so occupied in work and things happening closer to me . I haven’t made the effort to value who she is more than I should .

This post I would like to dedicate to her for the lessons she has taught me.

She leads by example in every thing she has unknowingly taught me . I would watch her be away from home for work. When she finally returns home she still ooze with energy and compassion for others . She would make time to go to her friends down the  street. I have been such a loner as a kid I only had Mrs Lewis and Shaka . I am so comfortable with being on my own. If I come home from work sometimes . I don’t want to have Shaka squeeze me the way he does .

I could be in a room full of people but would rather be alone . I am a total Gemini. She has shown me that if you value what’s important and you try and engage with people despite how you feel in that moment . Talking to someone is way more valuable than being one sided. You not only feel empowered by engaging in conversation. You don’t just add something to the table. Other people evolve from you too. They gain a sense of knowledge or comfort in knowing they spent  time with you.

We always talk about her past. What  she was like when she was younger . How she felt when she was my age . The last time I went home to cape town .I spent time with her. I took a trip by myself Shaka had to stay in Sandton for work. I slept over by her for a few days . She showed me older pictures . We had a pamper sesh. We went to the cinema. We visited relatives of Shaka whom I had never met before . We had lots of lengthy Convos .

I don’t feel like I am great at being present for her in the same light that she has been. I hope to hold onto opportunities like this while striving to create more .

Potential mother in laws while they still present shouldn’t be an insecure factor like it’s been for me .

She taught me tricks in the kitchen like 1 min pizza base. Her fav tart recipes or just that beautiful cup of tea.

You can always count on her for availing her heart. She would share a scripture for  you if it was your birthday . The first time she sat me down on my birthday I felt her warmth for the very first time . As she read me a verse she had her hands on mine. This was so unforgettable.

If it’s not your potential mother in law but someone who leads by example with connecting you to other people . Leave an experience in the comments below .

30 Day Challenge

Top 5 pet peeves 

Haaaaay You guys It’s day 3 of my 31 Day Challenge. Today’s challenge could be a bit of a touchy subject.  What are my Pet Peeves? I never use to get easily annoyed but I have realized the older I get the more easily I get affected by peoples behavior .As always I promise to keep things 100 with you and in my pet peeves it is about to get real down below.  You have been warned lol arrrrgh lets just get right in to it.

  1. Selfish Rambeling This would be the ME ME ME  people. The conversation is always about them.  When you discussing a personal situation. For example lets say difficulty in” your current relationship” . The scenario is specifically about what your partner is doing wrong right? These people generally make a relation between their partner and your partner. Comparing the two in the end. They don’t listen they just hear and add advice directly from their own experience. They have a hard time putting themselves in other peoples shoes. It is so hard for me to talk to ME ME ME people. Don’t get me wrong I love learning about people and I oddly find it interesting how ME ME ME people can be ME ME ME.
  2. Reverse Racism I will let this simmer over here and allow Superwomen to say it best

    A Geography Class for Racist People – YouTube

     

  3. Indecisive people dude I use to be one of them mainly because I never took responsibility for anything that went wrong. I learned a few years back to start thinking for myself and standing by my decisions. If you allow people to make decisions for you it is easy to point the finger and go well they told me to. Being in a relationship with Shaka taught me this big time. A lot of members in my squad were not thrilled about our relationship. They always said we give it about 3 years max then our love would run dry. My family members were not particularly thrilled and advised me to quit what we had. And again they had valid reason to. For more you can read over here. I would always allow other peoples opinion to fester on my mind. It affected the way I took responsibility for things. For the first time I chose Shaka despite the advice I got and when times were tough I had to stand by my decision and take responsibility for my role etc. Lately I have been meeting tons of people who beg me to tell them what to do. Whether it is personal advice or my clients. My clients really know how to get me frustrated with this one on a irritable professional level.
  4. Girls who don’t want to help other girls. Again I will gladly reference Superwoman yes I know I am a little obsessed with her. But why the hate you know what I mean what is the point. Why should we intimidate each other. I can speak from experience .I have had my guilty share of having the shoe be on the other foot. And time and time again I am told my first impression is not approachable. Sometimes I am saddened by hearing that. Other times I find comfort in that so people don’t step over me. I often use this as a blanket for protection to cover me for those mean girls. If you can relate leave a comment on this one.
  5. People who can’t be to the point regarding conflict or confrontation.  They will talk around the bush and be all verbose. Add hints but never say exactly what they mean.  It is so annoying because when S#!& hits the fan they dig up all the things they have been hinting about like months ago.

 

Let me know if we have similar pet peeves do you feel my pain. What are yours? Wish me luck for the rest of my 31 day Challenge and if you have  challenged yourself before. Leave links in the comments below.

 

 

 

 

 

 

30 Day Challenge

What makes me happy

Day Three of my 30 Day Challenge

Hmph what makes me happy well….

I love reading other people’s blog post . Each blogger adds fabric to the way we comfort ourselves. Here are a few blog post by Desert Missus  whom is giving me life right now in the blogging community. She has given blogging a new meaning for me .

I don’t want to list self glorifying and obvious things that make me happy . I really want to dive into a few post that really helped me find joy with my current situation . Whatever that may be. Figuring out being 20 something. Not being happy in my job or feeling stuck in my career choice. You know the usssssge.

 Little disclaimer:

 I asked permission before publishing this draft. The last thing I want to do is cut away the integrity of this piece.

The most recent blog post that stole my heart is right over here called Why Competence Always loses out to Confidence.

This was how much this post spoke to me , my response:

This was so meant for me. First off you killed me with your choice of words”bitch fest” ahs and jahs. It is always fun reading your blogs.

This was meant for me because I have been dealing with an internal bitch fest. I live in Sandton now and making the effort to call home in Cape Town is such a mission. No one picks up at the peek of my fumes. So I am just like forget it I will sulk for the next few days and then get over myself.

I have been senior in my position for nearly 4 years still earning the same salary since I started. I am training new staff that earns a R1000 more than me. Finding another job I haven’t been winning. My HR Manager hasn’t bothered to respond to my email. I can do more than a lot of the people in my office space. but you know what the fudge here I am in the same old financial boat.

However reading this post was such a wake up call like I could use this time to study the people around me and better myself for when the opportunity avails itself.

I literally bookmarked this post just so that I can have a read through it again at home. Cause this hasn’t totally sink in yet but the timing couldn’t be more perfect for me.

A little update regarding my response. My HR Manager eventually responded. And Yip I am pretty sure she does not read my blog nudge nudge wink wink.  In this moment I just needed to bitch fest . I looked at my day to day environment more of an “internship” than  this is what I have to do until something greater came along. I have learned to be more thankful for the mistakes that I have seen around me and the joys that comes with keeping an extra tab open on my works desktop.  I had to review whether I was upset about the money or was I just upset with feeling like I am not evolving. It if were not for coming across this post. I would have just probably moped in my misery.

 

Another great post from Desert Missus was the first interweb interaction we had . Her style of blogging is similar to where I see myself in the blogesphere Hello Girlfriend. 

When I grow up I want to have the lemonade she has to the lemons of life. I absolutely loved her date night ideas especially lounging on the floor with your hubby that you can read more about over here

A blog  a bit more personal to me you can find over here .

If I had to pick in terms of shaping my online identity and simply thinking about what I want to offer my online friendships on social media.  This post would be a winner.Five Ways to lose blog followers 

I couldn’t be more happier to add that Desert Missus has adopted me as her online niece lol. The joys of having a sense of family from across the world. The power of the internet couldn’t be more amazing right now. I am loving the way I am growing with her blogs. If she showed up for me through her work I am sure she can pull through for you.

Give her blog a browse Subscribe if you vibing with her style and join her personal branding course by a click of a button. It is free It is a sisterhood for keeping things 100. Women of all ages will find her voice relatable.

Drop down a comment of blogs that make you happy. I would love to check out blogs that adds life to yours. xoxo T

 

 

Scribbles from my Journal

Winter Favs

The beginning of Winter is always brutal right? But hay that is if you don’t get a head start for it.Prepping for hot meals , shopping for stockings, suede boots, scented candles and  all sorts give me life!

I love Winter so much I have a Pinterest board for it. Since I have been in the Swing of WordPress.I have met the most gorgeous  creative beings.Whom has been nothing less than supportive. You guys! My WordPress buddies. So in honor of what I have learned from bloggers and the gems I have been loving this season.

Here are my Winter treats for you.

Winter in South Africa has had its knocks and apart from all the blue weekdays we have had. I would like to list my Fav Products that has kept me going throughout this season.

Lux Shower Gel

  1. Wake Me Up this is known to invigorate your senses.Infused with Mineral salts , seaweed and fresh fragrances.
  2. Scarlet Blossom is more of a long-lasting scent. Containing fragrance pearls of Egyptian violet and elemi oil.

They were both on sale for R39 at Dischem

Scented Oils

  1. Eucalyptus oil 
  2. Lavender oil

Hot Water Bottles

Saves you money that would increase your electrical usage . Instead of putting a heater on or using an electric blanket. Hot water bottles are less expensive as a once off purchase and for long-term use.They great for providing heat but also relief  muscle pain when applying it on your tummy or back. I love my cute faux Fur hot water bottle . I purchased mine for R59 at Mr Price Home

Charcol face mask

I never knew how great charcoal was for you until I had educate myself. Face masking is a must for winter. The weather can dry out your skin and  Make your face more pale. It becomes even worst when you don’t take care of impurities and your skin suffers from dehydration.  I have been using this particular face mask.Its lasted me forever.  R99 from Dischem.

Diys

  • Wine bottle Bubble Bath Jar

Recycled Reuse I love keeping my favourite wine bottles for diys. I love putting bubble bath in mine.You can decorate the bottle however  you want. I love keeping mine in its natural state. It reminds me of the soothing taste and the cozy moments I enjoyed while sipping on a glass of something something

  •  Storage Jar

You need one clear container. I used my spread container I cleaned the jar after the spread was used up.You need a nice piece of rope long enough to tie around the size jar you will be using. Tie and knot or hot glue to secure a firm fit. Add any storage or decor items inside.

 

Journaling
I love journaling.  I jot down a few things that were heartwarming throughout my week. This is a good way of relaxing during the  winter.  Something to keep your mind positive yet busy while you under the covers or enjoying a hot drink

In the comments below list a few of your “Must Have” Winter items that you would like me to try .

Scribbles from my Journal

Lenghthy Convos with Shaka

Lengthy Convo Lessons

Lenghthy Convos is a Series on My Blog that detail a few lessons that I have learned from having “long conversations”. These conversations were personal encounters I shared with Family and Friends

I am laughing at this #bloggingproblems  before I even start diving in. I guess today’s blog will be a series in a series.

I don’t quite know where a “Young Love with Shaka Series” will lead to. What I do know is that my relationship with him is worth sharing with every girl I know. I learned to love myself through being his friend first. I value things like communication and honesty because of him.  I have been able to embrace being a feminist side by side with him. Together we sort of cutting edge I think with No filter. From the get go our relationship didn’t start off on an impressive foot. However where we are now is what I want to Introduce you to.

For those of you who are New Shaka is my bae for the longest time ever. I shared with you lessons my Aunt passed onto me and how she taught me how to be open to love and private about things like sex.

But in a nut shell ever since I was a kid. I knew I wanted a ton of kids. I loved an ideal wedding but I never imagined lasting in a relationship with the perfect man. I grew up in so to speak in a “broken home”.This was my normal I don’t feel disadvantaged by it or wired differently . I just didn’t know better than what I did at the time. Comment down below if you can relate.

I have seen great models of stabled relationships but when times got rough in those relationships . I never liked the gutty scenery and emotion that came with it. So how was I going to last in a relationship anyway.  Especially when I will watch chronicles of rage from a kids point of view. Telling myself one day when I am big it will never happen to me. I quit believing in marriage for a while. Until I met Shaka.

When we started dating I told him I want to adopt babies. I wanted to be a mom someday I just couldn’t see myself with a husband. My mom and dad never tied the knot and for a long time in my upbringing who gets to use their surname was always a thing that I didn’t have time for so I just had to throw that in there. I told him I wanted kids but didn’t see the point in being married to have them. Again my sense of normal. I didn’t want my kid to be like oh let’s visit dad this weekend and spend next weekend with mom you know. So I was down with adoption for more reasons than that of cause.

His views differed. I was feeling his vibe and was totally into him. As much as we were vibing  I never thought about loving him. Until he said he loved me. I was like saaaay whaaaat. He was walking me home not too long after we started dating and he just puked the words out casually. I L.O.V.E Y.O.U

This dude want his own kids. He sees his future with me as his wife . Like naaaah bra we not on the same page. Knowing that I had opposing views from him. He still said he loved me. We talked and talked for hours on Vodacoms night shift after 12 am. We had lengthy convos about all that I have mentioned above.

Today we still dating and I have opened myself up to love beyond my expectations. I considered marriage. The more I grew in my faith and learned how to love myself. The more my heart was opened to expanding my views on what “normal” is for me.

44 more days till we 8 years together. We traveled on flights. We moved in together. I now want my own kids and would like to adopt after I have one of my own. HUGE right lol but slow down guys all in due time and none of it soon o.k.a.y

Having lengthy convos really enhanced my perspective not exactly alter it.

This taught me that romantic relationships require lengthy engagements before you can really build confidence in each other.

 

Youtube Releases

Youtube Videos Tech Chic Chats

Ain’t no rainbow shinning on me shades of gray is the colour I see

Tech Chic Chats are back

I began my YouTube Channel with videos titled Tech Chic . It hasn’t been doing too bad considering that I didn’t know what I was really doing.

I am happy to add that my 3rd Tech Chic  Video is due this week . On that note I would love to tell you more about it. The tech Chic Videos are all about those trendy and Savy products we have to have .They include technological  products and my reviews and recommendations. I keep you abreast with whats to come on the market. We check out forecast Related to cellular devices.  Launches of Flag ship units from Android to Apple  . This is my unbiased opinion on items accessible to everyone in South Africa.  I explore features and measures to be more Tech Chic and Savy in one take .

Today’s blog I want to ease you into what you can expect from my YouTube Channel. Please subscribe if you would like to grow with my channel . Like this post if you are interested in all things Tech Savy and let me know what you think in the comments below

Mr? Miss or Mrs Gray?

The products are themed well in the style of gray .  Gray tones  are  versatile in a office colour palette. Especially  for all you young professionals seeking tech items for your office space . It adds a classic approach to whatever look you going for. Need I say more ? Well Yasssss

Here are a list of Shady accessories killing the game today. They are must haves. They affordable and value for money . The colour gray is totally wearable with any day to day look. Gray shades can balance out edgy elements.You can be creative with it especially in the work space. The following are items I think are so cool.

Viva Midrad Covers

I die for these phone cases. I love how slim and sleek they are. They transparent and chic cases with undertone shades. The one shown above has gray tones however you can find them in a ray of different colors.

They retail from R149 to R299. Depending on what type of model you have plus or standard edition. New or perhaps the model might be older on the market. (Potential price differences are dependent on those factors)

These cases are not robust but if you like me who cant stand a bulky looking device and appreciates tempered glass and Insurance then this is a go Getter.

FYI

There is nothing worst than spending a ton of money on a phone case with the intention to avoid an insurance claim. (like you afraid you will drop your device.The screen will crack you know the usual) In the event if it get’s  stolen or you throw your cover  away after 2 years when you get a new device most likely. Insurance company’s don’t generally cover accessories like your cover they pay out for the actual device.

Travel Power Bars

A personal travel bar is a must in your office space regardless whether the company has enough power supplies.There is nothing more annoying than working in South Africa. Where load shedding is no stranger to us. Our premises has generators in the event of load shedding however they only last for a few hours.  I would rather be able to head to a coffee shop and be able to charge my devices.

This is great for when you at a cafe and need to charge more than one device. They portable and travel friendly.  This is perfect when you at an airport and charging booths are fully occupied. You can find them almost anywhere. This way you score on being productive and don’t loose hours out on work and you still gain your money despite having primary technical difficulties  . This is a secondary life saver .

FIY

I would purchase mine at any store that gives me a warranty that is reasonable. Budget for at least R299 when spending on a power bar.

Intone Earphones

Shamefully I have had more than one pair of these only because they were not well taken care of. They my go to brand in earphone choice. Great in quality. Precision sound high in performance.  All the goods is contained in these langsdom engineered earphones. You can answer your calls.They maintain the same performance quality even when using entry level tablets instead of your high-end cellphones. They about R249 each.

Check my Youtube Videos for how I take care of my earphones now .

Stylus 

 They come in handy at the office especially if you in between devices like Ipads and cell phones.  If you finicky like me and don’t like finger marks on your devices.They great for taking quick notes. They last me forever and you know I am pron to break things or loose them. They pretty durable and have rubber tips that are exchangeable. They retail for R49 upwards depending on how high tech you want yours to function.

 Portable Bluetooth speakers 

This will totally be dependent on your office culture. If you allowed to drop it like its hot  cause I fortunately can lol lets focus T This is not about you but hay you know what I am saying?

This works well for office meetings or presentations if audio aid is applicable.  I always try to promote all things affordable. So I will list two options below That I use on a daily in the office.

Dlink

Retails for R399 this is more than fine for basic bass and multi functional purposes. You can take calls through this portable speaker. I use this at home for catching up on reviews from my I pad or phones.

Beoplay

On a high-end note I will introduce to you Beoplay they pretty pricey but hear me out. If you using an auditorium Beaoplay A1 is sufficient. If you need a long lasting battery life for a portable speaker. They brilliant for a 24 hr charge .Think of how useful they can be  for pop up stores or kiosk cubes. They retail for R4500. Voice interaction is compatible with each of them. If your company doesn’t mind splurging on something like this for you great. But trust me I know it’s a stretch from your own wallet and therefore I would recommend a Dlink Instead.

Drop down those comments to share your thoughts.Visit me on my growing YouTube Channel. xoxo T